Mommy Me Time – Why Is It So Hard To Do?
Seriously? . . . Mommy me time, why is it so hard to do?
The other day I got the “day off” from taking my little girl to preschool. She goes twice a week for 3 hours. When I take her, commute time shaves at least 30 minutes off of my potentially “me time window”.
Hubby wanted to do the drop off and pick up. This would have given me an extra 30 minutes to play with. There are a million and one things I could do with that time.
There are always errands to run, dishes to wash, laundry to fold, floors to clean, bathrooms to scrub, carpets to vacuum, shelves to dust, mail to sort, bills to pay, rooms to declutter, family activities to plan, parents to call . . . . and of course, blog posts to write.
My dear hubby has been awesome in supporting my blogging since he knows that is almost the only “me time” I get. So he encouraged me to blog while my little one is at school. But I find it extremely difficult to sit down guiltless at the computer while there are so many other things to do. So I first washed the dishes and sorted the mail before sitting down to write this post.
I’m sure you mamas can ALL relate. Whether you work in or out of the home, isn’t it extremely difficult to let things just be and make time for yourself? . . . . especially if you are trying to make time for yourself at home.
What do we tend to do? We tend to sacrifice another part of OURSELVES to make a little me time. For example, we may go to bed late or wake up super early sacrificing sleep for “me time”. Doesn’t seem quite right.
Suddenly going to the dentist alone or grocery shopping alone counts as me time. That’s not right either. It’s especially not right for us to allow our husbands to think it is me time, trust me, mine has tried calling it that.
My standard for what I call me time is based on what hubby would call me time for himself. For example, if going to the gym is just an expected part of his routine and does not qualify as me time then it doesn’t qualify as that for me either. If stopping by home depot to pick up some lights for the house doesn’t qualify as me time, then shopping for his and my daughter’s clothes doesn’t count either.
On occasion, I do force myself to do something for myself such as get a massage, get a pedicure, go to the movies, learn bunco with other moms, or do other low key activities on a mom’s night out. Recently, I went on a little weekend getaway with my sister. That was difficult to do . . . completely detach from the family for a few days.
Of course, both of us kept texting our husbands instructions on how to care for our little girls. Half our time was spent talking about our families. We weren’t ever completely mentally detached, but we got to go do new things, reconnect, and simply take our time eating, chatting, walking, sleeping . . . without rushing to take care of anyone. It was nice.
I’m convinced that true me time requires leaving the home. It requires spousal understanding, support, and encouragement. It requires planning. It requires ditching things at home as they are without feeling guilty. It requires us not being control freaks for a bit.
Most importantly, it is necessary! It is hard to do, but I think we should all figure out a way to do it.
I’m curious, how do you make time for yourself? What do you do during that time? Please share in the comments . . . . sometimes I feel I’m the only one struggling with this, so I’d love to hear how you handle finding me time.
By the way, before ending this post I managed to fold laundry and post an item up for sale on Facebook. Maybe it’s not so much guilt but ADHD? LOL!